I am so peaceful and 'at home' with myself these days. But for decades I felt an underlying melancholy. On the outside I was lots of laughs and very independent, but on the inside I felt doomed to being unloved - in some sad and fated way.
Why couldn't someone love me deeply enough to fill the hole in my heart? I kept trying to give my 'lonely child' away to others...asking them to take care of "her' and love her...but when they couldn't fill that emptiness, I would plunge down into my secret place of unlovable despair.
I honestly don't know what changed, what healed me. Grace, yes - and the blunt and generous love of Marion Woodman, and the love of my dear mate...and reading Jungian analyst Lyn Cowan's book, Portrait of the Blue Lady: The Character of Melancholy.
These gifts - plus living with beloved animals, feeling the beauty of the world and seeing now how the pattern of my life has been woven through with riches...slowly brought me the miracle of a full heart.
I finally knew that the one person who could properly love and cherish my 'little girl' was me.
Now...almost every day is a day of love..love of nature, love of animals, love of wonderful friends.
LOVE: 'filling up, spilling over...an endless waterfall", as song writer Cris Williamson sings.
SO. If you've ever been lonely - even in the midst of loved ones, even during joyful events, even in moments of success...
If you feel that your heart has been abandoned -
...think about it
Maybe you have abandoned your own heart...maybe you need to take time to cherish and hold and speak tenderly to that precious, unique, utterly lovable person - YOU!
WOW!
Posted by: Beverley | October 26, 2011 at 08:18 PM
Wow!
Posted by: Terry Butler | November 08, 2011 at 07:57 PM