April 06, 2008

SAINT RAFFERTY

The little-known Saint Rafferty, (Ireland, 1610 AD) is reborn in our red Rafferty the Cat. He exhibits all the traits thought to have brought his namesake to saintdom. Pure, unadulterated soulful adoration, deep melting eye contact, rumbling resonant voice, and an amusing playful affectionate personality. He is quick to forgive, and patient ....knowing food and treats will be provided. He is dedicated to peace and comfort. He is pictured here in his imitation of Saint Theresa of Avila.P1010005_1

March 08, 2008

TO TRUST, OR NOT TO TRUST...

Sometimes deep childhood wounds leave us wary, closed off to feeling, and sad iniside.
And, as George McDonough writes:

"Even when love has come, we slam the gate
And tell ourselves a tale and run away
Along our private inner roads while yearning
For this co-mingling, for this impossible stay.

Incredible we find the fable of surrender.
There will be no collisions in our sky,
No joining of our suns. Upon our soil
Ungrafted trees grow singular and high."

Sometimes it takes decades to risk letting a little love in. To risk trusting that we are seen, valued, and cherished.
How can we TRUST the person, the word, the look, the touch that challenges the sad "life story" we've believed for so long. The new story says, "you ARE lovable....you ARE precious... What if it is true? What if our early protecter is now keeping us from joy?
Trust YOURSELF to handle the risk of feeling all your feelings. It is worth it.

Here's a collage I made recently.
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February 08, 2008

LIGHT & DARK: or the anguish of being human

Why does it take so very long to learn that life is constantly changing, never perfect, full of ups and downs (even in our body chemistry, forpetesake), and that this light and dark business is an opportunity to become more resilient, more whole, and more accepting. I still find myself longing for a day when my closets are uncluttered, my weight down, my spirits up and all my relationships vital and intriguing. OH WELL!

Our climate here is a reminder of the constancy of change and the need to just take it as it is. Here the earth is starved for rain although the ocean is right there, and then, after years of waiting, the storms come in and drench the soil and the parched hills are emerald green again and the trees wink with drops of moisture, and the sky is pure blue...all washed and renewed.
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January 21, 2008

TREASURES FROM THE SEA

This morning I walked on the beach. Hardly glanced at the emerald waves ... the colors and shapes on the sand were SO glorious! The bright orchid-pink rubbery sea treasures lay tangled and perfect on the sand.

About 50 years ago I wrote about the healing power of nature. Here it is, slightly amended:...........................

..."Chance, or perhaps Providence has brought me here
to find relief
From cares too trivial and too monumental
to be labeled
And on the sandy shore, near the ever sighing sea
I find a moment to breathe deeply, sort out
the sources of unrest--
Bask in the sun."
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January 05, 2008

A CAUTIONARY TALE

Three score years ago, and ten..during a scarey winter storm in western Canada, my father made up this little morality tale. I sat curled on his lap while his dramatic Scottish voice rumbled and soothed....

Once upon a time there was a little baby bird named Betty who lived with her brothers and sisters in a cozy nest high up in a tree in the woods. Every day she watched her mother teach her older siblings to fly. She would gently shove them off into the currents of soft warm wind. Baby Betty was SO jealous, and begged her mother to let her fly....and every day her mother said, "Not quite yet, Betty...soooooon".

One day when her Mother went hunting for food, wee Betty hopped right to the edge of the nest, wavered there, and then with an impetuous jump, dropped from the nest into the huge grey sky....FALLING, falling, falling, until suddenly her little damp wings opened and she sailed on the breeze. "This is super", she thought, Mama was wrong, I can do it!" The very next minute a HUGE roll of thunder ROARED through the sky, and a GIANT black cloud full of white cracks of lightning tossed her up in the roiling air, and pummeled her tiny frail body...She cried out, terrified, but her little peep was lost in the WILD STORM.

The sky raged and the rain fell and the thunder boomed and poor little Betty was tossed and torn almost to bits. Then suddenly, when her little heart was filled with despair, she felt a strong body sail in under her, lifting her up out of the black clouds...."MAMA, she cried, I'm so sorry, I'll never disobey you again!"
And Mama smiled a knowing smile and flew bad little Betty back to her warm nest in the woods.Motherchild_ducks_pix_copy

December 25, 2007

PERKING UP THE AGING BRAIN

I turns out that our brains become less "plastic" or malleable as we age...our noodles get rigid and our electric synapses atropy. BUT, say the neurosurgeons, if we learn to do new, hard, complex, things, we can build unique pathways in our brains, and actually maintain or grow our intelligence. The other finding is that we need hard physical exercise to rev our brain cells. That's where I get discouraged. It is one thing to learn to use the tres complex new Pages program on my Mac, but do I have to go to the gym and pump iron... just to keep my mind alive? Apparently. Look what happened to poor Iris Murdoch, Oxford Don, deeply psychological author of 26 brilliant novels...who, in spite of all this intense brain activity, ended up putting her underpants on backwards, and not recognizing her dear devoted care-taker husband...perhaps because she lived up in her head, and rarely exercised her body. Say it isn' t true!

Don't you sometimes feel to tired or bored to improve yourself? On the other hand, learning can be fun. And my new year's resolution is to buff up, even if it is only to lift a big pile of tempting unread books onto my nite stand and settle in for a marathon brain surge.
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December 24, 2007

MAKING "DO" FOR CHRISTMAS

I just thought of another legacy from my mother! When she was 90, and dying, I was going thru her things in the retirement home...and discovered touching examples of her frugality, her willingness to "make do" with what she had, to resist waste, to save everything, and to "do it herself". I found bits of thread and lengths of string wrapped around tiny rolls of brown paper, little match boxes labeled "tiny tacks", carefully folded pieces of used christmas paper saved for next year...etc. So maybe I shouldn't be surprized to find myself using old but still salvagable things at Christmas....expensive ceramics are good; who knows how old they are, and how tired of them you are?

The other part of mother's "making do" legacy is the voice that says, "Why use professionals to cut and color your hair, when, with the right machine and a bit of L'oreal highligher...you can do it yourself. So after much research, I began gently cutting my hair with my new 13-piece multi-use electric hair trimmer. The back was easy, and the top O.K., but, woops, the over-the-ear comb-trimmer slipped and cut a swath of hair right down to the scalp....a very bad look for all the christmas parties...oh well, I covered the bare head skin with a touch of light brown eye shadow ...and with a wide headband I "made do"!

CHEERS
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December 01, 2007

SUCKERS, SCAMMERS, & SNAKE OIL

In spite of Commander Skeptic, that guy in my psyche who protects me from scams: ecomomic, religious, and psychological, I'm still a big sucker for HEALTH scams. I have a secret stash of health books and pamplets like: Take Care of Your Knees, 1000 Miriacle Cures, The Great Vitamin Hoax...ad nauseum. Yesterday I realized, with chagrin, that my Health Library is Huge...and almost never read or consulted. I know that if a remedy claims to cure, arthritis, heart problems, lack of energy, the heartbreak of psoriasis, and erectile dysfuncton - that it may be snake oil....but still...ONE WONDERS.

Then it came to me this morning....IT IS MY MOTHER'S FAULT.... she lived to be 90, and kept my father alive til he was 97....by studying Adele Davis and Rachel Carson. She believed in raw vegetables, whole grains and brewer's yeast....and once eliminated her fibroids with a strange diet of carrot juice, which turned her skin orange, but vanquished the tumors, and amazed he doctors. We all thought she was WEIRD ABOUT HEALTH..
even made fun of her. NOW, though, her grandchildren, even the M.D.'s among them, take mega vitamins, fish oil, CoQ10 and all that stuff. SO MAYBE I SHOULD FORGIVE MYSELF for falling prey to a six month supply of Sun Chorella!!! But I did resist the magical healing powers of that very expensive Asian WU WU tea THE "stars" are talking about!

For my own mental health, since I realize this addiction to health propaganda is genetic....I must burn all those books of remedies, flush the crazy pills... relax about the myteries of the body...and turn my ever-suggestible mind to simple solutions...like good food and, dare I say it? EXERCISE.Img_2159_2

November 09, 2007

MY DANCE CARD!

Here is my first Soulcollage card...many vibrant images of me, and others, dancing....If you look closely, you can see me dancing with Oprah, dancing on a trampoline, dancing at a Marion Woodman Crones workshop...and dancing in someone else's body! What joy to find my wild crazy dancer at this late date!Dance_card_best_copycopy

LIVING LIFE versus WEARING IT!

I love this quote from Sylvia Townsend Warner: "I think as one grows older one is appallingly exposed to wearing life instead of living it. Habit, physical deterioration, and a slower digestion of our experiences, all tend to make one look at one's dear life as a garment, a dressing gown, a raincoat, buttoned on with recurrent daily tasks...For myself I found one remedy, and that is to undertake something difficult, something new, to re-boot myself in my own true faculties. For in such moments, life is not just a thing one wears, it is a thing one does, and IS."
Something really difficult for me is dancing with wild abandon.